Bullet Proof...I Wish I Was

People often ask me what I do with my time, either because they're genuinely curious or because it's a way to fill in the spaces between words in our conversation.

I wish I had something awesome (and truthful) to say each time I was asked.  If this was the case, they could make a youtube video montage of all of my answers:

Friend:  "What do you do with your time?"
Me:  "Today I joined a fight club and punched someone's lights out"
"I jumped on the back of a unicorn and we rode a rainbow"
"I was hiding in a closet when I found the entrance to Narnia"
"I won a rap battle"
"I watched lotr: the extended version.  All three of them.  Back to back to back"

That last one is something I would actually do. I was searching for lotr pictures and this came up...I couldn't resist sharing.

In reality though, the answer is invariably:  "Work" or "Eating."

I love food so much.

These days, I DO have something else to say, however.  I've been getting up earlier and earlier, due to the fact that Seattle mornings are getting progressively brighter.  I keep saying that I wish Seattle would get a little warmer, but every time the sun comes out I grimace and go:  "Augh!  What is that thing??"

So to fill up those suddenly extra hours in my day, I've decided that May is "levitation month" and I started a Seattle series.  May is kind of perfect for levitation because we have a lot of sunny days in Seattle for some great outdoor shots, but there still aren't a ton of people out and about to embarrass myself in front of.

In case you don't know about my sometimes hobby, you should check out my levitation page here.  I got the idea when I heard about Yowayowa.  Her pictures are pretty fantastic and admittedly much better than mine.  But I like to tell myself that's because she's a professional and has an ultra hip and expensive camera...Plus she sometimes has assistants that go around with her to take the pictures and...well, I don't.  Nevertheless, her levitation shots are nothing short of magic.

I'm asked a lot whether I photoshop my images, and they're 100% authentic (besides a little instagram filtering magic).  This is how I do it:  I don't have a tripod, so I set up my camera (a standard point-and-shoot) on a yellow stool.  Sometimes I prop it up on an extra thick book too if I need the added height (my go-to book lately has been my Norton's Literature Anthology.  Very handy).  I put on a self-timer, run into place, and then jump at just the right time to get the picture.

and voila.

Now, this is all easier said than done (in case it sounded like a piece of cake).  I usually have to do several jumps to get the timing of the right-looking height.  It's difficult to make the picture look like you're levitating as opposed to just a jump shot.  Most of this has to do with the placement of the feet/legs, the relaxed posture of the hands, and the head.

I've found that I have the most difficulty with my face though.  Oftentimes, I'll have a great levitation shot...but a derpy face.  Probably because I'm thinking about all the factors I just mentioned.  Or maybe because that's just the natural tendency of my face.

Sorry, Beyonce. Apparently it happens to even the best of us.

Other than that, my biggest obstacle is probably the audience that may or may not congregate in the midst of these ridiculous looking jumps.  Just yesterday, I had the brilliant idea of jumping off of aforementioned stool to get more height on my leap.  Of course, I didn't factor in the coefficient of friction between my stool's legs and the linoleum floor.  Needless to say, I almost fell face-first as the stool skidded from my feet.  I'll include the picture that resulted just for giggles:

Thank goodness my hand is hiding my face. I have no idea how bad THAT face would have turned out.

The most common question I'm asked by people who are nearby (besides:  "What...are you doing?"  and:  "Do you need help?"...the latter which I hope pertains to aiding in taking the picture as opposed to questioning my mental health) is "...Are you exercising?"

Last week, a group of people started accumulating to the side just to watch as I did my jumps.  Yesterday, a few Chinese tourists took pictures of me while I was taking pictures of myself levitating.  I usually get more than my share of weird looks and chuckles, but for the most part people are either fairly accommodating or have a complete lack of care whether I jump around or not.

Usually, the first few shots I take of the day, if they're in a public arena, are semi-cautious...Or as cautious as you can be with a beeping self-timer camera that ends in a FLASH as you jump in mid-air in public.  Then, if no one complains or looks angry, I gain a bit of confidence and start jumping around more.

People are oftentimes curious about what it is I'm doing.  Some are surprisingly supportive.  The other day, a Trader Joe's employee contributed an employee shirt to the levitation cause for me to wear during my shoot.

Thanks!!

As to why I do it, I guess part of it is because the pictures turn out looking cool (or that's the hope, anyway).  The other part is that I've always liked the idea of flying.  I very frequently tell people I can fly.  It's part of the job as a dragonslayer, after all.  

I could probably develop cooler pictures with less effort if I utilized photoshop -- I actually had a conversation with someone at the coffee shop I was doing levitation shots in who said there's apparently a way to drag the floor down in an image to make it look like you're levitating/jumping even higher than you are.

But.  When I dreamed of flying as a kid, I always had to get a running start and a jump in order to take-off.  I think Super Mario Bros. had it right when they made Mario sprint and take a leap in order to get into the air.

Although I have NO idea why they decided the leaf/raccoon tail should be the thing that makes him fly...

So it makes sense that in order to levitate, I have to run and/or jump to get into the air.  If I can capture on camera that brief moment when I'm actually in flight, that makes me happy.

Besides, using photoshop is cheating.  I was going to post a picture here about that, but all of the ones I found on google images seemed too mean to share.

Pretty much.

As I mentioned before, I'm making it a Seattle Levitation shoot this month.  If there are any Seattle readers of this post, let me know if you have any suggestions/places you'd like to see!  If you have an instagram, you can check out my daily levitation pictures @bungeejumpwithme.

And now when people ask me what I do with my time, I tell them:  "I levitate."